"All of the great leaders have had one characteristic in common: it was the willingness to confront unequivocally the major anxiety of their people in their time. This, and not much else, is the essence of leadership." - John Kenneth Galbraith, U.S. economist, "The Age of Uncertainty"
Susan has just been promoted to the position of Manager of a group of health-care professionals over another person who has similar qualifications and experience. Until Susan's promotion, she was a member of the team and worked reasonably well with everyone. Since her promotion, she has encountered a range of situations (elephants) that she is reluctant to discuss or resolve. This might be due to her inexperience or lack of leadership training or possibly she has reached her level of incompetence (the Peter Principle states that people rise to their level of incompetence: A person might be a great salesman but a terrible Area Manager!).
As an example, yesterday, she arrived at work to discover that one employee is arriving half an hour later and leaving half an hour early EVERY DAY. This is known by everyone in the department. When she told a companion of this employee to start doing the work of the absent person, the companion told her that she was not prepared to do the work of the missing person every day and that as Susan was the Manager, it was her job to resolve the situation. Susan's reply was "I can't do that because she will get offended and take unlimited sick leave." so the problem remains unresolved. This is an example of an Elephant which affects everyone in the group.
This is an example of what is known as having "An Elephant in the Room". This is the term used to describe a situation, question, problem, or controversial issue that most, or all, of the people involved know about but do not want to discuss for fear of the potential consequences so they prefer to ignore it and hope that it will disappear.
However, the fact that someone does not like something does not change the reality of the situation. And an "An Elephant in the Room" should be dealt with as soon as it appears.
Effects of NOT talking about the Elephant.
1. If you don't deal with the Elephant head on you are pretending it isn't in the room. This is unrealistic and unproductive.
2. If not dealt with, it grows bigger and the manager appears weak, ineffective and lacking in leadership skills.
3. It dismotivates rest of group so productive and meaningful contributions are reduced.
4. Multiplies hidden suspicions, whispered conversations, rumours, gossip, frustration and the possibility of favouritism within the team / organization. It also reflects on other decisions made by the manager
Effects of talking openly about the Elephant.
1. Shows the Manager is sensitive to what is happening in his/her department.
2. Shows that he/she is in control of the situation & demonstrates their ability to resolve the problem with the elephant without fear thereby displaying their leadership skills.
3. Reduces stress / worries for others members of the team.
4. Allows for a resolution of the situation rapidly.
5. People might feel bad/worried in the short-term for discussing it, but they will grow out of it.
6. Creates a positive precedent for talking openly about other possible / future Elephants.
How to talk about it: Preparation
1. Know EXACTLY what the Elephant in the room is.
2. Understand how it affects the others in the room: professionally & emotionally.
3. Be the person to raise the topic.
4. Plan in advance what you're going to say & how.
5. Prepare a range of different alternatives to resolve the problem with the benefits and drawbacks of each one.
6. Speak ONLY for yourself. Unless you are a mind reader you CAN NOT know what the others are thinking.
Step 1: Identify and Name It.
- When you identify the elephant and give it a name it stops becoming problematic, intimidating & controlling, because it is now out in the open and people are able to openly discuss it, it becomes easier to resolve.
Step 2: Consult the Group.
- Ask members of the team to propose possible solutions BEFORE you outline your ideas. Consultation is ALWAYS better than imposition!
Step 3: Reach Agreement.
- Agree the next steps to be taken: Who will do what, when, how, etc., and ensure that the people involved agree and are committed to doing what they have agreed!
Step 4: Feedback.
- Arrange for feedback from the other people in the team or who are affected by this problem & solution.
Step 5: Help the Group Envision a Better Future.
- The manager should always express confidence that the agreed plan will be successful and that the Elephant is now tamed.
Step 6: Reward Success and Inform the Group about the Consequences of Failure.
-The team need to know the benefits of a successful solution and the consequences of failure.
To confront or not to confront?
There are times when the elephant is present in a group situation and, at other times, it might be with an individual person. Each of these requires a different approach.
When working with a group, IF the Elephant affects the whole group, it is better to deal with in a special meeting.
If the Elephant is (or with) an individual, it is usually better do deal with it personally in a one-to-one meeting behind closed doors and away from inquisitive ears!
Elephants exist everywhere: in business & outside. If you're with a customer and your organization has had problems which have appeared in the newspapers, don't pretend it didn't happen - admit it and move on. Most people will Google you & your organizations before meetings and will know what is happening. Be up front about it.